to judge

Since I was a 2019 Royal Palm Literary Award winner, I was asked to judge this year’s competition. Woot woot! So much fun! But a lot of work as well. There’s a lot that goes into fairly judging a writing comp. I won’t go into detail to save you from a snore-fest.

What I will go into is how the process got me thinking about judgement. The preconceived notion can become a skewed opinion about someone based on our own past experiences. It travels on a negative wave through gossip or internal judgment. We see it happen all the time.

So, no examples needed.

Judgy judgement breeds prejudices and anger.

Perhaps we believe a person should act a certain way. The truth is we have no power over anyone but us. And that’s why I’m mainly interested in our internal Judge, the one where we’re talking about ourselves in a judgy negative light whether it’s our appearance, the way we talk, the way we perform tasks, etc.

A lot of my clients came to me stuck in a cycle of tearing themselves down through judgment. They are they’re own worst critic. The result is oftentimes a stagnant mentality that has them repeating the same poor habits and getting the same horrible results.

Their self-judgements resound in their inner beings and stop growth. Period. How do you stop this vicious cycle? By stopping the pain of the ripple effect with God’s unconditional love, and subsequently, self-love.

When we believe God loves us no matter what (more on this later) we automatically love ourselves and are grounded in it, meaning no one can talk us out of it. We’ll automatically give ourselves the benefit of the doubt when we make a mistake. We’ll pick ourselves up, dust off and get on with life.

Another awesome thing will be birthed out of God’s inner love: we’ll begin to give other people the benefit of the doubt as well. We’ll see them in a new light.

So, the new loving behavior is a byproduct of the love you’ve chosen for yourself.

How do you accomplish this loving feeling? By persuading your heart through words of affirmation, self-care, self-talk, emotion, God’s Word and lots and lots and lots of creative visualization.

By doing this work, you get to build a belief about a new personal truth.

I invite you to record how you can begin to see yourself through love and acceptance.

What does that look like? Feel like? Imagine it.

Today’s Practice:

Be kind to you and make a decision to walk out of shame. To help you in this process, write by hand a detailed paragraph about how you would function without shame or another mindset. Really see yourself experiencing life through confidence, assuredness. How would you speak? How would your body language change? How would you treat people? How would you approach your career? How would your relationships shift?

Once you write this detailed account, find a quiet place to sit, close your eyes and allow what you’ve written to come alive behind your lids. Until you feel confident. Until you feel assured.

Remember, you are a powerful child of God, and everything you need to rise from the ashes of your past lives on the inside of you.